Thinking its More

Is it the eyes? They did get my attention. Thinking its more though.
The way she touches, the taste of her lips
The way she takes interest in me
For my flaws and  my mistakes
And she still wants to know me
The way she keeps my interest in her
Could it be magic? that's possible
Could it be attraction, well of course it is
but the is more, more than just physical...
I'm falling in love all over again...
The feeling is rare... and I think the feeling is mutual.
Love does carry magic with it...

I love you Karen :)

loves little secret

and so, what to do now...  
its never easy making decisions that effect the heart. 
Will I be left with that empty feeling?
Will I ever find another?
Is it really all that important? 
of course I can go on, as long as god makes me to wake I shall...
I've been blessed, tormented, disappointed and then blessed again
and to whom do I owe all the torture? 
I fall short of an answer there with out GOD!

just a few words

You are the one I love
You have no say in the matter
If I die tomorrow it will be
With the knowledge that
I have loved the one I am meant to love.


Life is not so much about how much you love
Life is about how much you are loved

In the End (and not the Rush song) no pictures this time either

There are so many that don't see the progress. Many still feel its a mistake, and as the time wanders, it is becoming apparent to me, like I said right from the start, No it is not. This is the right thing to do, you just don't know what all was involved with our relationship's demise and failure. I am taking the second chance because I can and it has presented its self to me. 

This being said:
I will take you back a few years, to the day I met Theresa, aka MsNeo. I was single, alone, and going through one of the tougher times in my life. The job had changed, through the loss of one job been evicted from one place to another.  Later to be dragged through the coals of an already charred life and still came out like roses; though residing in.... well lets just say not the best of best places to be living.

So... in walks MsNeo, as the one bedroom needed to be 2 and we needed to live about 2 blocks north to be in the current school district of her daughter, I sail to the end of the lease, clean up, find a new place and get moved out, in and collect my deposit. That would have never happened with out Ms. At this point, I had moved for sake of love and found myself beyond the small city, into the abutting Township. Township for some reason just has a nicer ring to it. VS "I live in the city of" I could actually tell the quisitive ones "I live in the township of"... ok... so I'm a bit on terms and names and maybe even a little upity in my ways. TOUGH! I am who I am. So on with the story. We had it rough with that land-person, (note I left out the 'lord' part); and moved another block north, still in Sycamore Township. This one beats em all; dishwasher, central (beats the tar out of radiator heat and window unit a/c) nice neighbors and a pretty nice grounds too boot. 

Bring to the present, Ms having walked out on me, trust me I deserved that kick in the shorts, then she comes back to me, I deserved that too, but only by the virtue that I am truly in love with this woman and was truly remorseful for what I had done. As you should be able to see quite a bit of positive, progressive change has taken place. Including and not limited to MsN gets a newer vehicle, we set up a cell phone account, new computers and software come in the picture. This is all material to this point. There was however a great change of  the  intrinsic sort also. Being in love has a way of doing that to a guy. I was for the most part a happier man, more driven and focused on success. I just can't get over what my feelings for this girl do to me, and for me.


I'm not real sure at this point what the future holds, but I am happy for the present, and will soak up the love (I can tell she really does love me) :)






ick

For my grilfriend, then its just a rant...

Oh what a beautiful morning... oh wait, that's already a song. 

Well it is, so I guess I am here saying the song speaks volumes of truth. 
So with love I send these flowers to a specific female, (I know you already got them once) ... Just wanted you to know I will always be there and always willing to lend a helping hand.(think there's another song in there)


Strange, I was always under the impression that if less than a dozen flowers should always be in odd numbers, to 'round out' the bouquet.  Seeing this grouping of 6 makes me think twice on that, but perhaps this would have worked better with 7? There does seem to be a blank in the top center of the arrangement. Though I do work in the agricultural field I am not a florist or flower designer. 

In a way, flowers become my enemy from say, april to november. Largest of the flowers I fight would have to be dandelions, what I have come to know as "panic weeds". Was about 2 years ago I was on my way to do an application for a customer. When I pulled up in front of the house there was a 'tree ring' and immediately to the front door side of the tree ring was a dandelion in full bloom! This being the only weed in the entire lawn; but man it stood out like a broken arm... thus the name "panic weed". 

Just Me or This is My Life

ok here's the deal, everyone, well, almost everyone is telling me its a mistake. I for one don't think so. I even got a message back from one of the girls I was talking with said I sounded sad with out her (MsNeo). Yes, a lot is still the same, and much has changed; I can deal with it in a different way this time.
See, the break down of the relationship wasn't just her doing, it was me too. So much went on, had I dealt with the issues a little different things would have turned out different. The ones saying its a mistake could be right, but those that are really my friends understand, this is my life, I am the one to make the decisions and the true friends are willing to support me in my decision. 


Well time is running short, I need to get some things done today, thought I would jot down the thoughts I am having and well, I will post again soon