#1501

In my day:

Kennedy: assassinated while I was in diapers

Johnson: from what I have read was a biggot

Nixon: just got caught doing what he needed to do for National Security

Ford: took office via chain of command as Spiro couldn't seem to get his tax papers done correctly or on time or both... as President, Ford proved to be unworthy of the job and that does including tripping on the tarmac to Air Force 1 several times.

Carter: other than his "fireside chats" did little to get this land moving in the right direction

Reagan: no complaints, seemed to have an idea of what needed done and how to execute such, had great charisma as I have read Kennedy had.

Bush: please?! One would think as Vice President would have learned a thing or 2 

Clinton: cool guy but cool guys shouldn't be in politics let alone President of the United States

Bush Jr: was what they had to offer... aside Catrina, the damage to the Great Sphinx, Vietnam and what ever else you want to blame him for; did an alright job

 Obama: I see evil in this man. PERIOD!

I think it is time we looked out side of Government "lifers" and Lawyers to fill this job, maybe someone with accounting in their background?

Cartoons in real life... or Hi, I'm Ariel

     I did already post about my birthday last night, but I did leave out a few details, one such detail would be at the Sandbar. Pretty cool little bar down on Kellogg Ave along the Ohio River. Part of a series of shops, clubs and a marina The Four Seasons Marina. The sign out by the street calls it Pirates Cove. So you know I would have to like the place. So anyhow... I went down there last night as part of my birthday celebration, was invited by a friend, a mini class reunion, I can by memory count 7 maybe 8 old class mates there. I was there with my girlfriend Karen who at one point in the evening had pointed out the one "big gal" sitting at the table beside ours. She later mentioned "oh my god, doesn't she look like the octopus lady on the Little Mermaid? Now the lady she spoke of, I turned to look and... well son of a... hell yes, she was dead on Ursula, jewelry and all, lol. It was funny; we were watching, trying to get a chance to snap a shot of her with the cell phone, to no avail. She was sitting just rambling at the mouth, talking with the guy sitting beside her. He was apparently very disinterested in what ever it was she was talking about.  In all my days, I have come across people, usually strangers, that look at least similar to animals, other people or even cartoon characters. Never before have I seen some one so close in resemblance that you would swear she was that character.  I did at one point tell Karen to go strike up a conversation with her, and introduce yourself as Ariel.

Signals get crossed

In reading through the info I came across a device on the Cassini Space Craft I have never before heard of. The Cosmic Dust Analyzer. Might this be the same as the  Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator? 
Oh, sorry, different planets.

Lets go to the Zoo

This is a story of long, long ago, in a room with a green carpet, and... oh, get on with it!

   When photos can capture a moment forever:

I grew up in a veritable zoo; 1 dog, several cats, fish, several tanks of, 1 bird, and of course my addition 2 gerbils. Their cage was constructed of an old fish tank, the 10 gallon one with the nifty new "habitrail" lid on top. Not quite as elaborate as the photo but, you get the picture...  Combining cats and rodents is a bit of a challenge, therefore my bedroom door was always shut; save the times I was in close proximity with a watchful eye. One day, I approached said door, being in 1/2 open 1/2 closed position, I walked in rushed, afraid my furry 4 legged friends had met their so called maker, Rosana Rosannadana, the cat. To my relief no cats to be found: instead Daisy (the dalmation disaster mutt) was perched in the middle of the floor; arms crossed, innocent looking gaze, as if you say "What?!". Daisy had torn the lid off the tank, it lay there, not so worse for wear, but the 2 gerbils had escaped. In looking I was able to recapture one of the rodents. Baffled by the missing rodent, I turned to Daisy to ask her where the other creature had gone; like she's really going to answer. There I saw, hanging from her mostly closed mouth, a tail! I would give a million dollars to have a picture of this. I reached over, opened the dog's mouth and out popped Rogo, the missing gerbil. Who, immediately scurried under the bed as he hit the ground. I was able to get him back to his cage, before he had dried completely. It was without a doubt one of the most comical events of my youth.

Giving the man his due...

Well no wonder before Columbus in 1492 they thought the world was flat, and being a flat world the water had to go somewhere. Hence, the point of no return. So one sees Chris must have been out of his mind, the ones that signed up to be the crew were off their rockers too. "Are you kidding me, can't you see, the water comes to an end and...." So... what was it that Christopher Columbus saw that put this crazy idea in his head and to risk it all. And all for what, just to have a day on the calendar named for you, and not everyone gets that day off of work? In my estimation Christopher Columbus got "Historically Jipped"


  exploration... I wonder... does it really...

Next time Columbus Day comes around... Lets just party like we're going past the point of no return.

When does Duh start with a capital D

     Not sure you will find this as amusing as I did, however... I was thinking, when I go to buy lunch meat top rating choices would be Roast Beef, Ham, Turkey or Baloney (bologna). Since only one of these choices has more than one word couldn't we chop it up and make it an easier order? Instead of Roast Beef, why don't they call it R B.... ding! wow... Arby's???? So.... that's where they get that name. (am I slow or what?)

Silly aka Comic releif

Ok, those who know me, or sorta know me or even know me in a strictly electronic way will know  I am not a gamer... video games are just not my thing. However... I know you're laughing in a lmao way. Pirate the cook... ha! Well I am really hooked on this little game, "Cafe' World." I know you other bloggers aren't into the social network... that lower caliber "blogger" or as some call, "the blogger wannabe". Some of the games you can do on Face Bookie or what ever are really addicting. While I am building up my "cafe" adding decorations adding tables and chairs, I maintain a meal for the random customers... silly stuff I know. In compare with what I started with, I have built "Pirates Pub" into an outstanding eatery. Stop by some time, we do have a shrimp cocktail to die for.

The Brain

click image to enlage

This is a hunting dog?

all puns intended, thanks Mrs P

1. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.

2. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident.
He shouted, 'Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs !'
The doctor replied, 'I know you can't - I've cut off your arms !'

3. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.

4. What do you call a fish with no eyes ?
A fsh.

5. Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says, 'Dam !'

6. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were a bit cold, so they lit a fire in the craft.
It sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

7. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel,
And were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories.
After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to
Disperse.
'But why,' they asked, as they moved off.
'Because,' he said, 'I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer.'

8. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt , and is named 'Ahmal.'
The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him 'Juan.'
Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a
picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, 'They're twins ! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal.'

9. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time,
Which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.
He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet,
He suffered from bad breath.
This made him (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good) .
A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

10. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends,
with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh.
No pun in ten did.

1

a drunk stumbles out of a bar and sees 2 priests
says to priest #1 "I'm Jesus Christ"
the priest repleis, "no you are not son"
same thing with priest #2, he grabs them both
by the sleeves and says "I'll prove it to you"
goes up to the bar and the bar tender says
"oh Jesus Chirst, it's you again"

laff with me

Home alone, but I am ok with that.
What's with this Vonage thing, the phone service; I thought I remembered it being $19.99 a month. Now seeing TV and hearing radio ads stating "always" been $24.99... cable and phone service rates climbing... yata yata yata.
Is there no truth in advertising anymore?
Like Pepsi is better than Coke or Burger King is better than McDonald's??
And what may I ask ever happened to not using the competitions name in advertising?
I remember the days of the "Brand A and Brand B"

Hay while we are on the subject, how come my air mattress didn't come with a "cat clause" ??

So, I'm in Cincinnati for a lay over. I am having my usual cup of coffee and the waitress asks "can I get you another cup of coffee?" I respond "please" and she says a little louder, "can I get you another cup of coffee?"

not mine but:
always keep a trash bag in your car, it doesn't take up that much room and when it gets full you can just toss it out the window.

oh my god

What is your name?

I just can't help it... lol

It's only a flesh wound...

Early Steve Martin, Remember Johnny?

some old stuff, Johnny Carson and Steve Martin

old Steve Martin Material

how come George knows all lthis?

be warned, you may thank me

due to facts beyond my control (I know its a weak excuse) I will be stepping out, though I don't really want to. Surgeon General should have made it a bit clearer. The warning label on the cigarette pack should say "Though it looks cool now, you will have a monkey on your back for the rest of your life, it will cost you a fortune to smoke, is hazardous to your health and any attempt to quite will more than likely fail.

Beyond that there should be a disclaimer when buying a computer and signing up for internet service backed by the Surgeon General that reads: Purchase and signing up for this service is likely to make you a hermit, lose touch with reality and will increase your smoking habit 10 fold, will cause you to drink more coffee than Juan Valdez can grow in a year, and will no doubt warp your sense of humor.

and again, thanks tribbles